Prince Wishes He Could Party Like Eustachy

Manhattan, KS- Over a beer, last weekend, Ron Prince admitted to his neighbor, Robert Shills, that he wanted to be more like Larry Eustachy. "He just came over to our porch" Said Shills, "So I offered him a beer". Before his neighbor knew it, he was spouting off "If I could just have one night of an apartment party with 20 year old women". Shills explained. "Eustachy looked so cool on ESPN's Page 2, I would kill for that kind of pub". Shills explained that he wouldn't shut up about these stupid Kansas State web sites. He mumbled "They make me look fat.

He kept on saying things like "Everytime I go to a party people ask me to do the Carlton dance." "I don't get it, my last name is Prince, maybe I should turn my jacket inside out? Why am I such a dork? Is it my hair?"

Shills said "Prince cleaned me out of all of the beer in my garage refridgerator" "I would have thought he was Larry Eustachy himself, except he didn't have hair". Shills was in good spirits explaining that he had "a 'whole nother beer fridge in my basement". Shills then smiled and said "I hope he never finds out my two daughters attend Kansas State."

Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights.The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.

The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking. "Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads: Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework. "Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the Sign reads:Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opens a New Wives store just across the street.

Floor 1: The first floor has wives that love sex.

Floor 2: The second floor has wives that love sex and football and have money.

Floor 3:The third through sixth floors have never been visited.Men apparently are easy to please.

Ben Folds--YES!

He's coming here. And by here, I mean Omaha, which is fantastic given that this tour is only 8 dates long.

Just announced US Tour:

03/04/06 Seattle, WA Paramount Theatre (pre-sale going on now)
03/07/06 Omaha, NE Sokol Auditorium (pre-sale begins 2/9 at 1pm EST)
03/09/06 West Des Moines, IA Val Air Ballroom (pre-sale going on now)
03/11/06 Madison, WI Orpheum Theatre (pre-sale begins 2/9 at 1pm EST)
03/12/06 Milwaukee, WI Eagles Club/The Rave/Eagles Ballroom
(pre-sale begins 2/9 at 1pm EST)
03/15/06 Columbus, OH Lifestyle Communities Pavilion (pre-sale begins 2/9 at 1pm EST) 03/17/06 Indianapolis, IN Murat Egyptian Room (pre-sale begins 2/9 at 1pm EST)
03/18/06 Ann Arbor, MI Michigan Theater (pre-sale begins 2/9 at 1pm EST)

He really gives Nebraska and Iowa a lot of love via his tour schedules. I have no idea why, but I'm not complaining. Who's coming with me?

Freeman: Out of the Closet

Manhattan, KS- Kansas State recruit Joshua Freeman was "so clearly, obviously" gay in retrospect, fellow student Bernard Sitzman, 18, realized Monday.

"Me and a bunch of people in class were thinking about how he acts in class" Sitzman said. " I was just about to say something about Freeman always wearing purple when it hit me. How in the world could I not seen that he was gay?"

Freeman has been without a girlfriend for 4 years and frequently hangs out with his mother. "Freeman never talks about girls." Said Sitzman, a friend since the 6th grade. Sitzman is "99.9% sure", he is a homosexual.

"I thought he acted flamboyant because he was an arrogant jock," said Sitzman. "Josh played with Barbies and also had a toy poodle named Sasha he'd occasionally bring to football practice. He also enjoyed traveling to New York to see the newest musicals".

Added Sitzman "I knew he was different, but as a 12 year old, my understanding of gay culture was limited to David Hasslehoff".

Ever since coming to the realization, Sitzman has remembered more details about Freeman that seem to affirm his gayness. Among them are sack lunches of yogurt and carrots he ate on field trips, his excessive attention to detail when dressing and his elaborately decorated locker."

A good Wednesday Laugh

A little down today? I've got the cure to whatever ails you.

A good laugh.

Particularly "The Dawn of a New Era".

In other news, Ron Prince isn't the only new hire in Manhattan, as they also have a new PR guy.

Cover Train

Buddy Holly- Everyday
The Beatles - That'll Be The Day (Buddy Holly Cover)
Martha And The Vendellas- Something (Beatles Cover)
The Kinks- Dancing In The Street (Martha And The Vendellas Cover)
Hermans Hermits- Dandy (Kinks Cover)
Morrissey - East West (Herman's Hermits Cover)
David Bowie - I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday (Morrissey Cover)
Flaming Lips- Life On Mars (David Bowie Cover)
Beck- Do You Realize (Flaming Lips Cover)
Johnny Cash- Rowboat (Beck Cover)
Bob Dylan- Ring Of Fire (Johnny Cash Cover)
Rolling Stones- Like A Rolling Stone (Bob Dylan Cover)
The Who- Under My Thumb (Rolling Stones Cover)
The Ramones- Substitute (The Who Cover)
U2- Beat On The Brat (Ramones Cover)
R.E.M.- One (U2 Cover)
Sufjan Stevens- The One I Love (R.E.M. Cover)

Tobacco Tonight

I just had kind of mini-epiphany that made me happy. I pulled up ESPN.com's college basketball page to see if Joe Lunardi had put any more than 3 Big XII teams in the dance this week (actually, he had 5, giving ISU the final nod), when I realized I had been completely oblivious to the fact that Duke/UNC is on tonight (8 p.m. CST, ESPN).

One of my favorite small pleasures in life is realizing during the late afternoon that there's a more-than-watchable sporting event on TV that night. Occasionally it'll be a Thursday night college football game, maybe a Nebraska baseball game on TV, Monday Night Football, whatever. While I'm not a person you really have to sell on watching regular season college hoops (I did watch the entire Xavier/GW game last weekend), especially after the football season is over, this is a regular season matchup I have absolutely no problem watching from beginning to end twice a year. It's appointment television.

Things to watch for tonight:

-Apparently if you become an internet hero for unknowingly being duped by a stoner from Maryland while supporting J.J. Redick, he'll drink with you.

-I'm not as much of a J.J. hater as many non-Duke fans are, but I'm a little sick of the Redick/Adam Morrison debates. Shelden Williams will be the most dominant player on the floor tonight. A couple weeks ago he made Craig Smith look like a little girl by swatting everything that left Smith's hands, including passes to the officials right after timeouts. If you count defense, which the game of basketball does, you've got to give Williams more love than he's receiving.

-Will Tyler Hansbrough step up the intensity in his first exposure to this game, or will he stick with the "I don't hate Duke, but when I play them, I won't be nice"?

-Will the ACC refs call a solid game but be less trigger-happy with the Ts now that the ACC has established that referee suspensions are now fair game? (By the way, bravo, ACC)

Second coming of Rod Stewart

The latest video for the band Train, "Cab," was playing on VH1 this morning when I turned on the tube. Is it just me or does the lead singer for Pat Monahan, Train's lead singer, sound like the second coming of Rod Stewart?

Here's a sample of Cab, now compare that to Stewart's Maggie May or Forever Young. The clips are courtesy of Amazon.com.

The good news for Monahan is Stewart landed a hot woman with that voice. The bad news is she left him, and now he just a washed up d-bag.

And so concludes this random thought.

11 Years Ago This Week

-Future service academy head coach Bobby Ross thought better of blaming San Diego's 49-26 drubbing by the 49ers Super Bowl XXIX on the officials.

-Ben Roethisberger's future groomer gives us the the Top Ten things Dan Rather would never say on the CBS Evening News.

-Denver International Airport makes final preparations for its grand opening.

-Speculation as to whether "Forrest Gump" can challenge TNT-staple "The Shawshank Redemption", "Pulp Fiction" or "Quiz Show", which no one ever saw, for Oscar supremacy.

-On your Ipod (I mean tape deck):
Hootie & the Blowfish: Hold My Hand
4 p.m.: Sukiyaki
Tom Petty: You Don't Know How it Feels
Greenday: When I Come Around
Weezer: Buddy Holly

Team above Southeast

For those of us non-Knight Lincolnites who had the city sports dominance of Lincoln Southeast pounded into us during the 90's, there has been some respite since the entrance of Lincoln Southwest and Lincoln North Star to the fray, which has dilluted the Knights' dominance, especially on the football field.

However, just as the rest of the city gets comfortable, here they come again, now claiming the #1 spot in Class A Hoops from both the LJS and OWH. And if it wasn't hard enough to take, the more coverage the Knights get, the more we get to hear more about the Lincoln native who inexplicbly chose to voluntarily become a Longhorn. At least he could have made it easier on us Lincolnites by choosing someplace like Pacific, Marquette or Arizona St. like all the other Lincoln guys do.

The combination is enough for me to throw up a little in my mouth.

Paul McCartney @ The Qwest Center 10-30-05 Omaha, NE

The beginning doesn't sound very good because the sound was bad at the show. The rest is pretty decent.

CD 1
CD 2
Cover
Back

Download: disc one
1. Magical Mystery Tour
2. Flaming Pie
3. Jet
4. I'll Get You
5. Drive My Car
6. Till There Was You
7. Let Me Roll It
8. Go To Get You Into My Life
9. Fine Line
10. Maybe I'm Amazed
11. The Long And Winding Road
12. In Spite Of All The Danger
13. I Will
14. Jenny Wren
15. For No One
16. Fixing A Hole
17. English Tea
18. I'll Follow The Sun
19. Follow Me

Download: disc two
1. Blackbird
2. Eleanor Rigby
3. Too Many People
4. She Came In Through The Bathroom Window
5. Good Day Sunshine
6. Band On The Run
7. Penny Lane
8. I've Got A Feeling
9. Back In The USSR
10. Hey Jude
11. Live And Let Die (missing beginning of song)
12. Yesterday
13. Get Back
14. Helter Skelter
15. Please Please Me
16. Let It Be
17. Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band / The End

Daily Nebraskan Quotes- Circa 1999

One of my favorite things to read in the Daily Nebraskan was the basketball quotes during the Nee days. Pure comedy.


VS. KU- March 8, 1999 KU77 NU53.

Danny Nee
"They kicked our ass"

"Every time you miss a free throw, it's like a coffin - you can feel that dirt coming down on you."

Venson Hamilton
"Once I missed my first one, I tried to steer everything,"

"They shot that first 3-pointer, and that sent us a message that they were ready to play," Hamilton said. "Their intensity was high; we didn't match it."


Andy Markowski
Vs. KU (March 08, 1999)
"They shot the ball well; we didn't shoot the ball well."


VS OU February 18, 1999 OSU 60 NU 48

Venson Hamilton
"After that went in, I just looked at Larry (Florence) and told him right there, 'It just wasn't meant for us to win,'" Hamilton said.

"We had an off night tonight," Hamilton said. "We played miserable."

"This is going to hurt our chances bad," Hamilton said. "Everybody's mad. Everybody knows they could have played better ... much better."

Danny Nee
"We're still in a good position to control our own destiny," Nee said. "We just talk about winning the next game."

Upcoming Shows In Our Area

Sokol Hall

Monday, March 13, 2006 9 pm Ghostface / M-1 of Dead Prez $20
Tickets
Ghostface- Charlie Brown (clip)

Friday, March 31, 2006 9pm Clap Your Hands Say Yeah / The Brunettes $10
Tickets
Clap Your Hands Say Yeah- Upon This Tidal Wave Of Young Blood

Monday April 3, 2006 9pm Death Cab For Cutie
Tickets $25 in advance, $27 day of show
Death Cab For Cutie- Title and Registration

Uptown- KC, Missouri

Tuesday March 21, 2006 Wilco Tickets $27
Wilco-The Late Greats (Live)

Your #1 Texas Longhorns...Still looking for a Win

Since I started following College Baseball right about when Nebraska started consistently winning (I admit it, I wasn't on the bandwagon pre-2000), I've always tried to be aware of when the season starts, not just for Nebraska, but for all of the NCAA teams. Every freaking year, I'm thinking that there haven't been any games played, and I see a headline like "Jayhawks at 11-1 after series with Hawaii-Hilo".

Once again, the season apparently started and no one told me, but my frustration about the stealthiness of the sport quickly diminished after seeing that our friends from Austin, who also are consensus #1s, started the 2006 campaign 0-3.

I don't know what it is but cheering for Texas' baseball demise, however minimal it is, is akin to the joy that fills my heart while watching the downfall of the Colorado football program.

Mikki Moore- Penthouse suite, 10th floor Schramm

I began going to the University in the fall of 1996. I lived in the Harper/Schramm/Smith dormitories my freshman year. Specifically on the 5th floor of Harper with half of the men's basketball team. If I can remember right, Cookie Belcher, Tyron Lue and Larry Florence all lived on my floor. I think Troy Piakowski and some others were thrown in there too. Troy used to somehow buy us beer. A majority of the athletes on campus lived in these dorms for some reason. Those are all different stories.
I had a friend from high school, John, that lived on the 10th floor of Schramm. On the first day of college he went to take a shower on his floor. It was super awkward to be showering in a new place. Especially because there was a small curtain covering the shower. A little different from home. I remember in my dorm, wanting to shower as fast as I could. John is half way done with his shower when he could tell someone was in the shower beside him. Then he noticed something moving out of the corner of his eye. It was Mikki Moore's head peaking above the shower divider. John looked at him. Mikki Moore said "How's it going" with a smile similar to Chris Rock's. In fact, I later found out that Mikki was just really excited for the first day of school. My friend John, with shampoo in his hair, immediately turned off the shower and returned to his room.

RPI Update

Despite knocking out hot-shooting Baylor on Saturday, this wasn't a good week for the Huskers RPI-wise, as they dropped from #81 to #94.

Why the drop? Even though it was a win, Baylor's RPI is at #156, and to keep the pace in the RPI top 100, the wins have to be against teams in the top 100. Wins against 150+ ranked RPI teams won't move you up, in fact, those wins get you pushed back by the current of "RPI peer teams" who are getting quality wins in conference play. Fortunately, there is no one else we'll face all year that has an RPI below 150 unless Texas Tech really falls apart.

The other thing working against Nebraska's RPI this weekend was the performance of teams that Nebraska has beaten this year. Of the 15 teams that Nebraska has defeated, only one of those teams had a win this weekend against a D-1A opponent. That was Oklahoma St. who somehow pulled out a game they shouldn't have won against Kansas St., another Nebraska defeatee.

On a partially-related sidenote, I watched that KSU/OSU game, and I now have to ask this out loud: What is the freaking deal with Eddie Sutton's lip this year? Have I just never noticed this before? The guy is melting down on the sidelines every game and during each rant, as it builds to a crescendo that one would expect to include a beautifully woven tapestry of profanity, removal of the jacket, chair-throwing, and perhaps even an "I've had it up to here" gesture, it climaxes in this 7-year old girl pouty lip thing. It's a little puzzling.